As I sit hear just knowing this is going to be my hardest move ever with all the things I have to "leave" behind I hear this we are going to miss you, we love you, what will this place be without you. Well I sit here saying...you can't truly get it until you have walked in my size five shoes, the feeling of what it is like to move every two to three years. Leave everyone that you make friends with behind. (I know this is a life we chose when we were young but as you get older it doesn't get any easier. When you are 18 you don't think that far ahead lol) People don't realize that when you move life for everyone else that you left behind goes on, that Tiffany as the military wife has to start over, new base, new area, new neighborhood, new friends, pray that we find a new church that fills that void when you leave the old one behind....this is so hard to keep doing. I am almost 38 and truly I am not ready to let my son go into this world, I am not ready to move again and leave everything and everyone behind but what choice do I have. Well I have two...
One, I keep wollaring in my self pitty, blend in the wall like a wall flower so I don't have to deal with it, stop doing things for God's work and quietly slip out of town ....or I can look at it as a honor....
I choose honor. Although I am sad some of the time thinking about this, cry about it to my friends, so clearly reminded every time I see my sons acceptance letter for college and the for sale sign in my yard when I walk out of my house. I am honored that my God thinks so much of me that He chooses to move me time after time again to further His kingdom. I may be sad that I move and that life goes on without me but how can I be sad that my God chooses to move me all over the world so that I can be a light, His light in a very dark world.
Today was a huge emotional day for me (in the most awesome way) as I was asked to baptize two friends. As I did it hit me with a ton of bricks of how God used me here to do work for Him. We take for granted having a church there every week for us. A church that we come to with open doors, very transparent people, a place to FREELY worship our God, a place to raise our hands high while worshing with songs, a place to further our relationship for our God.
The series we are doing in church today is called Who do you think you are? Well let me tell you who I am, I am a daughter, a mother, a military wife, a friend, and I am a masterpiece, God's masterpiece. He created me with a purpose way before I was even born. If I sit in this world and don't do His works that He has called me to do then what good am I to my family, my friends (near and far), to strangers that we have that chance encouter with to share my God with.
So as I have more days that go by and it gets closer to moving. I am going to well as they say put my big girl panties on and honor my God. Honor that He had and has a plan for my life. I may not like it and throw some fits but I stand firm in knowing He has a plan for me and it is a plan that is best for me.
Thank you to all my wonderful friends over the past 18 years in the airforce and civilian world for letting me in knowing that soon you will say goodbye. Treating my family like yours, for letting me be in your heart and most importantly you leaving a huge heartprint on my heart.
So as I close this post I clearly thank you God for choosing my life be part of your bigger devine plan. A plan that you loved me so much that you carefully took my lifeprint and want what is best for me. You have placed me right where I needed to be in each time of my life without fail. Although I do not know what your next plan is for me, I do know you already have it taken care of.
So I, Tiffany Kalin, am your masterpiece God, and it is only by your Grace that I have been saved......until next time.
